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4 Foods to Help You Look Years Younger

spt biase thanks 2 yahoo website lor....artikel by: Joy Bauer..


A good face cream can work wonders, but it's equally important to nourish your skin from the inside out. Below, I present four delicious foods packed with essential nutrients to keep your skin looking radiant and fresh!

1. Sweet Potato Fries

Sweet potatoes are a dynamite source of beta-carotene (their bright orange color is a dead giveaway). Your body converts beta-carotene to vitamin A, a nutrient that helps to continually generate new, healthy skin cells.

I like to turn sweet potatoes into crispy oven-baked French fries. Cut peeled potatoes into ¼-inch strips and spread them in a single layer on a baking sheet coated with oil spray. Mist the fries with oil spray and season with salt, black pepper, or any other seasonings (ground cinnamon, curry powder, and chili powder are all fun options). Bake in a 400 degree oven for 20 minutes, flipping the fries halfway through. I finish my fries under the broiler for 5 minutes to get them extra crispy!

2. Balsamic Carrots

Like sweet potatoes, carrots come equipped with a generous supply of beta-carotene. In addition to its pivotal role in skin cell renewal, beta-carotene acts as a potent antioxidant, sopping up damaging free radicals that accelerate skin aging.

Fend off wrinkles with my recipe for Roasted Balsamic Carrots. Cut 1 pound of peeled carrots into 1/2-inch wedges. Spread the carrots over half of a large sheet of aluminum foil, and sprinkle them with ¼ cup balsamic vinegar, 2 tablespoons minced fresh rosemary, 2 cloves minced garlic, ¼ teaspoon paprika, salt, and pepper. Drizzle the carrots with 1 tablespoon olive oil and fold the foil over to create a tightly sealed packet. Place on a baking sheet and bake in a preheated 400 degree oven for 25 minutes or until the carrots are tender.

3. Spinach Marinara

Spinach delivers a triple of dose of wrinkle-fighting antioxidants: vitamin C, vitamin E, and beta-carotene. All three work in concert to protect your skin from the sun's UV rays so it stays vibrant and healthy.

Make a quick spinach marinara sauce by wilting fresh spinach leaves into a pot of simmering tomato sauce, then serve over pasta or grilled chicken cutlets.

4. Toasted Pecans

Pecans are one of a short list of foods rich in Vitamin E, a nutrient that's vital to skin health. By forming a protective barrier in the cell membranes of your skin, the vitamin E in pecans helps to ward off harmful free radicals and therefore helps to keep skin firm and elastic.

Pecans are delicious on their own, but toasting them makes them incredibly buttery and rich...they're like candy! Spread pecans on an ungreased baking sheet and toast them in a preheated 350 degree oven (or a toaster oven) for about 10 minutes (watch them closely to make sure they don't burn). Enjoy them whole as a scrumptious snack, or chop them up and sprinkle them into oatmeal or low-fat yogurt.


p/s: some of the resepi adalah xsesuai ngn kite org malaysia n islam so just change cara memasak k....

5 habits of happy people ....by Sarah McColl

Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. ---Abraham Lincoln


One of the most fundamental ways you can make over your life isn't to lose 10 pounds or conquer your closet clutter, it's to change your perspective into something more positive. While unhappy people, to paraphrase Tolstoy, might be dysfunctional in 10,000 different ways, upbeat folks have some habits in common. Crib from their notes to bring more joy into any day (yes, even a Monday).

Reach out
Studies show that relationships are vital to a positive outlook in life. And it makes sense --- engaging with others reminds you that no matter how crappy your day or foul your mood, you're not alone. A superficial interaction like chatting with the mail carrier can make you feel like you belong to a community, but intimate relationships are what keeps us going even when times get tough. Send a text to a college friend telling her you're thinking about her, or call your spouse just to say "I love you."

Be thankful
This is worth repeating again and again. Each of us, if you can believe it, has so much to be thankful for. There are the big things, like a loving family and your health, but then there are a million little things, too. When you adjust your perspective to be grateful for all that you have rather than bemoan all you don't, you start living life in the positives, and the results are immediate. Learn how to create a gratitude practice.

Live your passions
Even if you spend 8 hours a day at a job that doesn't exactly have you leaping out of bed in the morning, you can still find ways to do the things that make you feel most alive. In fact, you owe it to yourself for your own happiness and well-being. Whether it's making doll house furniture or roller skating, taking part in activities you love gives your life a sense of meaning and pleasure. Be creative about how you're going to work your passions into your day --- maybe you can form a book club at work or start writing that novel on your lunch hour. Read more about how to make the most of your daily life.

Make do
We live in a culture obsessed with buying stuff, and when we're sad, many of us turn to retail therapy for a quick boost. But that high is short-lived and leads us to spending money we don't have which, doh, only makes us feel worse when the credit card bill arrives. Instead of turning to shopping malls to buy the thing we hope will suddenly make our life happier and complete (never works, does it?), make the most of what you already have. Try "shopping your own closet" (or your man's) and wearing that other 80% of your wardrobe you seldom get to. Or give what you already own some TLC to breathe some new life into it. Maybe your kitchen just needs a good scrub down --- not a new refrigerator --- to feel shiny and new again. Every time you have that impulse to spend, make an effort to make do with what you already have.

Enjoy the simple pleasures
The best things in life, just like the bumper sticker says, often aren't things and they're usually free. Think babies laughing instead of Porsches. Get lost in the way the sun comes through your windows, the vibrant yellow of spring's first daffodils, or a perfect piece of golden toast. Make it a point to bring pleasure into your life and to really savor the delights that are abundant around you already.



p/s: just a copypaste from yahoowebsite....tq to yahoo...
p/s: testing utk autopublish....huhuhu

America idol top 11

just a quick update psl a.idol last nite....msh lg bosan...ramai yg nyanyi xbarape nk best...kecuali 2 3 org....yakni crsytal, siobhan n big mike....crystal dh kembali pd landasan....siobhan makin wowwwwwwww....mmg ala2 adam lambert lah die nih...suke sukeeeeeee...

aaron kelly pon makin best w/pon x sebest yg 3 tuh...sweet jer tgk budak nih...dh la smlm idol mentor adalah miley cyrus (ramai yg komen miley xsesuai jadik mentor erkkk...faktor umur yg d bahaskan...) rs lawak tang aaron dok bg statement suke miley tuh....maklum ler budak2 kan...

n last nite temanye carta billboard...kite prasan si simon 2 kalo peserta nyanyi lagu2 yg lama2...old school mst dia xbrape suke...nak lagu yg terkini jerkkk...1 lagi kalo nyanyi lagu yg xbrape nk femes...mst kena kutuk arrr...pas2 kalo peserta 2 biase nyanyi bersama instrumen msti dia xsuke kalo tetiba nyanyi tnpa instrument...ala cam kes crsytal smlm lahhh...bila Kara soh crsytal nyanyi tnpa gitar 2...simon lak xsetuju...so, kite tgk nxt week....kalo crsytal xpakai gitar ape dorg nk komen...huhuhu...

n...mlm nih adalah result...

Best Foods to Eat in Your 20s, 30s, and Beyond

like always.....cop paste from yahoo website......by: Joy Bauer


You've been told how to dress for your age, but what about how to eat for your age? Here's a list of some of the "best bets" to include in your diet as you transition from post-college life to middle-age... and your nutrition needs evolve.

The 20s: Building a Strong, Healthy Future
You can't live off of coffee, alcohol, and pizza forever (ah, the good ol' college days). As you transition into the working world, now is the ideal time to lay down a healthy foundation for the decades ahead.

Best foods:

Skim latte - You're a grown up now! Trade in your sugary mocha-frappaccino for a simple yet sophisticated latte made with nonfat milk. You still get a hearty dose of "stay alert" caffeine, and the milk provides a hit of calcium and protein for strong bones (they're still growing, even in your 20s).

Oatmeal - Say goodbye to rainbow-colored, sugar-coated breakfast cereals from your school days and hello to healthy whole grains. Oatmeal is a quick, satisfying breakfast that will add a jolt of nutrition to your daily menu--and it will only take seconds to make if you nuke it in the microwave. -- kite dlm peringkat mencuba mknan ala2 oatmel nih...msh xbrapa nk suke...

Spinach - Time to start eating vegetables! Spinach is one of the most nutrient-dense veggies on the planet, so adding some of these leafy greens to your meals is a one-stop way to dramatically boost the quality of your diet. Plus, you can buy the leaves in convenient, ready-to-use sacks, so it's a terrific pick for young adults who don't want to waste a lot of time in the kitchen. -- salah 1 sayur bdaun yg kite sukeee

The 30s: Boosting Energy

Between building your career, running after kids, and managing your social calendar, every day is a frantic whirlwind that can leave you feeling totally sapped. You need energy-boosting snacks that are easy to grab between meetings and meltdowns.

Best foods:

Nonfat yogurt - Yogurt offers both quality carbohydrate and protein in one convenient package. The carbs fuel your brain, while the protein stabilizes blood sugar so you stay alert and focused. -- pon mknan yg blh diterima tekakku

Peanut butter sandwich - Toss a peanut butter sandwich on whole wheat bread into your bag for an easy meal or snack on-the-go. The bread supplies slow-burning carbs to keep your system revved, and the peanut butter provides protein and healthy fat. -- owwwwwwwww me dont like peanut....

Homemade trail mix - Create your own nutrient-packed snack to take on daily travels by combining healthy whole grain cereal, nuts, and/or dried fruit in a snack bag (if you have an insatiable sweet tooth, you can throw in a tablespoon or two of semisweet chocolate chips, too). Your homemade mix doubles as a terrific emergency snack for cranky kids.

The 40s+: Protecting your Heart and Brain

Perhaps your latest check-up revealed that your cholesterol levels are creeping upwards, or maybe your memory isn't quite as sharp as it used to be. Some strategic additions to your diet will help keep your body's most vital systems functioning at optimal levels.

Fatty fish - If you haven't already done so, it's definitely time to make fatty fish like wild salmon, sardines, and trout a regular feature on your weekly menu. Fatty fish is the best source of heart-healthy omega-3s, which decrease inflammation throughout your body and improve your cholesterol profile. -- kite adalah kureng mkn ikan...kena usaha mkn ikan lebih nih...cayok...tp ikan skg adalah mahal kn???

Beans - Beans are one of the most concentrated sources of fiber, which lowers LDL or "bad" cholesterol and reduces the risk of heart disease. Plus, they're rich in folate, a vitamin that may help slow cognitive decline. --- wah...inipon kite xbape suke...huhuhu

Berries - Animal studies (and preliminary trials in humans) suggest that regularly consuming antioxidant-rich berries can help preserve memory and cognitive function as you age. Double bonus: Berries, especially blackberries and raspberries, are an excellent source of fiber, so they'll benefit your ticker, too. -- ini sukeeeeeeeee tp fresh berries adalah sukar didapati kt mall biase2...xkn nk g mall super duper hebat semata2 nk beli menda alah nih kn kn kn???


p/s: tips kt atas nih rsnye xbrape sesuai utk pendiet yg tegar...sesuai utk yg diet ala-ala jerrr..
p/s: tabik la pd org2 yg diet tegar nih...like me yg xbrape nk sukses bab2 tahan mkn nih...sesuai la follow tips nih...coffee adalah feveret sy,...minum pun stok air b'gula (ssh nau nk nelan air putih)...xbape gemar mkn sayur...dohhhhhhhh...camne tuhhhh...

my feeling like spining in d moon...

since i hav an issue with my BFF n not seing BFF like a month,...my mood always swing...but i realise its not healty for me...so, i decide to cheer myself...to kontrol my mood n my feeling t'utama masa kt opis....biase lah ms kt opis mmg sentiasa mcabar kesabaranku with 'peel' my opismate n boses....n i got veryyyyyyy bad news for me (but its damn good news 4 her actualy)...my good opismate merangkap my roomate n hmate segala will resing from this opis....huhuhuuuuuuuuuuu...mmg menangis x blagu lah jwbnyerrrrrr....me tersangat lah rungsing xtau nk ckp camne dgn xde tempat nk ngadu lg (since hav issue with BFF....) oh hanya DIA yg tahu hatiku kala itu....me susah ati sbb she satu2nyer kwn kt opis nih + g n blk keje mmg tumpang keta dia.....ha camne tuh??? so terasa cmne nk survive kt opis nih pasnih n camne nk g n blk keje (ok,...g keje xdelah prob sgt b'cos bas = me naik at 1st station, so xde makna nk rebut ngn org)...but blk keje is issue....cos the will pack like sardinnnnnnn u know...n abis lah my kepala will spining....n dua tiga menjak nipon my head alwys spining dh....dowh....

so, me got 2 issue now....ngn issue wif BFF x settle2 lagik....n now my collague alyws question me...."how me???"...agak korang ler 'how me now?"....sape nk jwb???????????

d battle began...

top 12 bmula....dgn tema ....The Rolling Stones



Michael Lynche, "Miss You"
He said in his intro package that he was the ham of his family. Get out of town! Big Mike a ham? It can't be? Ok, so you get it. The arrangement was passable and his singing was fine, but his performances continually make me a little crazy. I'm all for energy, but it doesn't come across as genuine. It was, as Simon said, corny.
Judging the Judges: B Randy didn't love the arrangement, but still digs his voice. Kara liked how Michael filled up the stage, though Simon called his dancing desperate. (Also, Kara, the Rolling Stones are still rolling. Let's cool it with the past tense references.)

Didi Benami, "Play with Fire"
I haven't kept it a secret that I'm kind of pulling for Didi to go far, though I don't think she'll ever win. But her performance tonight, without a guitar no less, was one of the best I've seen from her. She had a couple of missteps early, but she found her grove and delivered an intense performance that added a layer to what we've seen from her previously.
Judging the Judges: A Randy said she's on fire for the first time in weeks, and Simon and Kara agreed she's moving towards what she wants to be as an artist.

Casey James, "It's All Over Now"
Ok, Casey. If you're going to break out the ax and play rock god, you shouldn't need to look down at the guitar every third note. The song was a good fit for his bluesy voice, but it felt very simple and lacked a spark, even though it was one of the very few performances of the night that even attempted to rock out. He's yet to show any personality to go with his looks.
Judging the Judges: B Ellen made a crack about her sexuality, which is indicative of how helpful her comments were all night. Simon said Casey has to give more of a star performance instead of just standing there.

Lacey Brown, "Ruby Tuesday"
After four weeks of virtually the same thing over and over, I'm going to say it: Lacey's breathy singing just doesn't work for me. I much prefer when she hit the full-voiced notes at the song's end. Not only does it not sound put-on and affected, she also manages to hit her notes. It wasn't the worst of the night, but it left me very cold.
Judging the Judges: D None of them really said anything helpful. Worse, Simon repeatedly said there was nothing wrong with the vocals, which I have to disagree with. They weren't terrible, but they certainly weren't spot on.

Andrew Garcia, "Gimme Shelter"
I was certain that Andrew was going to be this season's star in the audition rounds, but boy has he fell flat. To his credit, Simon addressed the terribly contradictorycriticism the panel has given Andrew so far, most of which included their refusal to let go of his "Straight Up" cover. Tonight, he sang as if he felt uncomfortable and honestly never quite got where he was hoping to get. Again, it wasn't as bad as last week, but he left me wishing someone else had chosen that song.
Judging the Judges: B Kara said the song highlighted the parts of his voice they'd been missing, but she also played the role of Literal Song Interpreter, again to the chagrin of Simon. "What do you want him to do, come out in a tank?" Simon asked when she said he didn't connect with song's message about war.

Katie Stevens, "Wild Horses"
Yawn. And I didn't think anyone could top Susan Boyle for the tamest version of this song. Katie's problem is simple: She has zero control of her lower register. At times in the beginning, she sounded as bad as the clip of her as a kid they played in her intro package. She improves as she gets into her upper register, but until she gets the top-to-bottom thing figured out, she will continue to suffer.
Judging the Judges: C The judges seemed to ignore the first part of the song, and praised her strong voice. Kara noted that she's yet to be technically perfect, and Simon said she at least chose the right song.

Tim Urban, "Under My Thumb"
Painful in every way. I'm not sure when Tim decided he was this season's Jason Castro (Castro also did "Hallelujah"), but his reggae rendition was about 37 kinds of wrong. Yes, his vocals were miles better than his Week 1 performance, but I couldn't get past everything else in order to care about them.
Judging the Judges: B Ellen said she felt like she was at the beach. Kara applauded him for doing his own thing, but Simon said it was a crazy decision. He said Stones fans probably turned off the TV.

Siobhan Magnus, "Paint It Black"
Wow. First the negative: Something about the key of this song pointed out a weird foghorn-sounding section of Siobhan's voice that was as unappealing to listen to as it was to watch her face when she was singing it. But when she kicked in, she blew the roof off the place. Her take was original, and she hit some crazy high notes once again. She was the female Adam Lambert, and I mean that in both the best and worst ways possible.
Judging the Judges: A They were all beyond words, and Kara made the Lambert comparison as well. Simon warned her against screaming at the end of every song.

Lee Dewyze, "Beast of Burden"
Our other resident rocker went for a stripped-down version, which I found a bit disappointing. I liked the song, though, and thought Lee was more in tune than we've previously heard him. He just needs to work on enunciating because there were several times that I was sure he'd forgotten the words.
Judging the Judges: B Ellen wanted him to rock out, and Kara complimented him for the fastest growth. (Though fixing pitch problems quickly shouldn't be a compliment: In-tune singing should be a requirement for the top 12). Simon said Lee needs a stand-out performance in order to go to the next level.

Paige Miles, "Honky Tonk Women"
The fact that Paige even walked on the stage is a tragedy, considering Katelyn and Lilly went home in her place last week. That said, Paige did bring back her big voice, despite suffering laryngitis. (And since the judge played that pity card so hard, she'll probably hang around.) In truth, she wasn't bad and she did seem more comfortable on stage than most of her competitors. Still, I miss Katelyn.
Judging the Judges: B+ Kara said Paige was back and Simon said she's still better than the generic barroom rendition of the song she delivered.

Aaron Kelly, "Angie"
I was a little surprised by Aaron tonight. I think it was wise for him to go all soft and sweet, because he certainly was never going to match up to the Rolling Stones. And after going after big songs (and last week, failing) this was a nice reset to show the incredible maturity and control in his voice.
Judging the Judges: A The judges agreed he connected with the song, and that it was the perfect choice. Kara said it was powerful.

Crystal Bowersox, "You Can't Always Get What You Want"
What say you Bowersox nation? There was nothing to gripe about in Crystal's performance, but I don't think anyone can rightly say they were blown away by it She delivered a trademark Crystal performance that was both well-sung and believable, but I'm beginning to get the feeling that there might not be anything more than her strum-and-sing approach. Still, in this bunch, she's a standout.
Judging the Judges: A Ellen wanted to see more personality from her, and Kara said the lack of personality came off as cockiness. (Yeah, I don't get that, Kara). Simon told her to dig deep and not assume she's already won because tonight Siobhan beat her. (And uh, Simon, you are the only one who has been saying it's hers to lose.)What did you think of the top 12? Who do you think is in danger of going home?


p/s: patotnye n3 ni wt last week...br selari ngn soklan last 2...apo dayo last week bz....
now, people already now who out right???...thats lacey brown...to early for judges 2 save peserta...jauh lg perjalanan...takat ni my fav is Crystal Bowersox....hoyehhhhhhh...but gotta to agree with judges about siobhan...1 persembahan yg mnarik....mgg mengiatkn pd adam lambert...huhuhu...

6 Weight-Loss Tricks That Don’t Involve Dieting or (Much) Exercise

lagi info yg d copypaste dr yahoo....huhuhu...interesting n blh la kalo nk amalkan bg sape2 yg nk diet n kurus tu...of cos for me 2...


By Deborah Kotz, USNews.com
The advice for losing those stubborn extra pounds seems so simple: Eat less, and exercise more. But as anyone who's ever tried to lose a few pounds knows, putting that advice into practice is very tough. Cut back on calories too much, and you're overwhelmed by hunger and your metabolism may slow. Exercise like crazy, and the hunger pangs you feel a few hours later may trigger you to eat back all you've burned off-and then some. - i'm agree

And let's be honest, no one really wants to keep track of every bite of food. My teenage daughter, while reading this U.S. News article on restricting calories to live longer, asked me how many calories I ate each day. I told her I had no idea-though probably more than my body needs. Truth is, despite having ghostwritten a slew of bestselling weight-loss books in my previous life as a freelance writer, I've never actually been on a diet; I know my lack of discipline at sticking to a prescribed eating plan would make me fail miserably. Still, I'd like to shed the 10 pounds that I've gained over the past decade, and I'm wondering if there are a few tricks that can help me along. I asked Adriane Fugh-Berman, a physician and associate professor of complementary and alternative medicine at Georgetown University Medical Center, to give me some tips that have been backed up by solid research. (She previously helped me decipher the ingredients in QuickTrim, a weight-loss product being endorsed by the Kardashians.) Here's what she recommends:

1. Eat hot soup before a meal. Research suggests doing so before lunch or dinner helps people eat less. "That's probably because you can't eat hot soups fast, which gives your digestive tract time to send satiety signals out to your brain" before you begin the next course, says Fugh-Berman. She recommends eating a soup that is not cream based to save on fat and calories.

2. Don't eat heavily just before bed. Sure we've all heard the credo that body weight is all about calories in, calories out, but it turns out it may also matter when you eat. Fugh-Berman says she has seen preliminary research suggesting that taking in sweet, high-fat foods (ice cream, anyone?) right before bedtime appears to decrease calorie burning and increase fat storage during sleep. "Consuming that same snack earlier in the day doesn't appear to have the same effect," she says.

3. Live like a city dweller. People who live in cities weigh less than those who live in the suburbs probably because of "incidental walking," says Fugh-Berman. "Those few blocks that you walk to grab lunch or run an errand really do add up," she says. Plus, the daily activity is incorporated into your life so it doesn't feel like exercise. It's easy to do and not like a workout that you can skip or quit altogether. Don't live or work in a city? You can mimic the effect by parking a few blocks away from the drugstore, dry cleaner, or post office. Fugh-Berman says she has a slim friend whose only exercise is using the stairs instead of the elevator to get to his office on the ninth floor. Going up and down once or twice a day gives him a fairly good calorie burn. -- 9 tingkt 2 u all...fuh..so, people mr la rmai2 jln kaki or panjat tngga je...huhuhu...don't use elevator or lift now...hurm, umahku ting. 1 jorrr..

4. Try a dash of chili pepper. If you can stomach it, try a chili-laced appetizer right before your meal. It "appears to have appetite suppressant activity," says Fugh-Berman. "One study found that those who ate a chili-pepper-spiced food right before their meal ate less at the meal." Mix a teaspoonful of chopped chili pepper into mashed avocado, or sprinkle ¼ teaspoon of chili powder into chopped tomatoes for a predinner dip. -- ni xke kena apendix or buasir nnti eh???..but i luv chili 2...

5. Limit caloric beverages. Drink 260 calories in a Starbucks grande caffè mocha (or a smoothie, or any other sweetened beverage) before lunch, and you'll still eat the same number of calories at your meal. But eat a bagel or handful of jellybeans containing 260 calories, and you'll actually consume less at lunch, according to one study. It's not clear whether our stomachs actually feel fuller from solid food or whether we trick ourselves into thinking that we haven't actually "eaten" if we're drinking calories rather than chewing them, says Fugh-Berman. -- so, kpd peminum2 air yg manis2 2 hati2 la yerrr..me 2...haishhhhh.

6. Weigh yourself once a day. This certainly helps me maintain my weight because I make a point to cut back on snacks if I've gained a little. And research backs me up. A 2006 study from Cornell University found that college freshmen instructed to weigh themselves every morning gained almost no weight during the school year compared with a 7-pound gain for those who weren't given a scale. Though I'm not sure how much the scale helps me personally. I find that every time I've lost a few pounds, I give myself a little permission to indulge-and the pounds come right back on. -- jom hr2 timbang...laris la penimbang kt supermarket nih kang...

p/s: i think it easy 4 follow butttttt brape byk je blh turun nih???...my weigh sgt senang naik n sosahhhhhh nk turun...nipon dh berminggu2 xtimbang since dh xpg umh my BFF...uwaaaa..
so,...hope d info can help u people..

hai everyone...

testing....testing....

6 Signs you're in a healthy relationship..

no idea wat 2 blog...so,i'm just copypaste this information yg i jumpa kt yahoo...just 2 share here...

Not long ago, I published an article about six qualities to admire in others, and the response was extraordinary. I prefaced the article by saying that the six I mentioned were by far not an exhaustive list, but included those traits that seemed especially hard to find. In reading all of the comments, however, I was inspired to write a follow-up list that covers some of the other qualities that I, as well as others, believe to be important when looking for friendships and relationships with others.

Our relationships are vital to our mental well-being. However, toxic relationships can really do a number on our happiness and outlook on life. As a result, it is important to look for individuals who possess qualities that allow for healthy relationships. Although, once again, not an exhaustive list, the qualities listed below are those that should be at the very heart of a healthy relationship. And, just as you would expect your friend, family member or loved one to display these qualities, it is just as important to reciprocate.

Loyalty: Whether it's in friendships or in family, loyalty is truly important to maintain a healthy relationship. All of us are guilty, at one time or another, of making mistakes, having ups and downs, and even displaying some behavior that we may not always be proud of. When we find friends or loved ones who can forgive us and stand by us…even during our worst moments…we should be especially grateful. That said, loyalty should never be taken for granted and we should always be deeply appreciative when it comes our way.

Respect: I once knew an individual who was very opinionated about political topics. She would talk down to people who disagreed with her and would be very disrespectful. Not only did she make people feel stomped on, but she left many disinterested in friendship. Treating others with kindness and the respect they deserve is important in gaining the respect that WE desire. It never feels good to be taken for granted, judged or used and it doesn’t feel good to be talked down to or treated rudely or inappropriately. There will be times that we may not always have full agreement with our friends or loved ones, but respecting them along the way is a must.

Unconditionally There: There is nothing worse than having someone always resurface in your life when they are in need, are looking for something or need a favor. In a culture of “you scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours,” it is somewhat rare to find those “who just scratch your back,” period. Finding individuals who want you in their lives just because…and not because they want something in return is refreshing and worth holding on to. Those who are generous of heart are to be treasured!

Trustworthy: I once worked with a woman who, within my first week on the job, felt the need to tell me all of the intimate details of the various extra-marital affairs that had occurred with the management of the firm. She was supposedly friends with these people and I have no doubt, was told this information in the most strictest of confidences. How she felt it was appropriate to divulge this information to a new-hire like me, I still have no idea. But, it was her nature to gossip about everyone and everything. If you share something in confidence, you should be able to trust that the information will remain that way.

A Genuine Sounding Board: Taking a genuine interest in what others have to say and really listening to someone is important in developing solid relationships. Letting go of the “me, me, me” and focusing on the other person not only makes the other person feel valued and appreciated, but they feel that they can really talk to someone who cares. Those who take the time to really listen to our thoughts and feelings, and then help us work through difficult times and situations, share our lives at a much deeper level than those who don’t. These are individuals worth hanging on to.

Dependability: I had a friend who frequently would RSVP to small gatherings and then would never show. They never explained…never brought it up…and never apologized. Although this example is somewhat trivial, it still makes the point. Obviously there are times when things come up that prevent individuals from following through on what they promise, but if a friend, co-worker or family member perpetually drops the ball, they may be sending you a message. If a friend says they are going to do something or be somewhere, you should be able to count on them. And, in reciprocation, they you.